Dealing with the Push


Work can feel like it’s pushing against you.   Unrealistic deadlines, conflicting points of view, difficult personalities, demanding clients …

And often, they are not alone.  Pushes can gang up and multiply.   They can feel exponential.    It’s not just work that can be pushing.   Pushes can come from all parts of life.

How you receive that push is wholly up to you.    Here’s what I mean by that…

A push is a force against us.  It can be many things … a physical force, the force of an insult, the force of a judgement or criticism, the force of stress.   A push is designed to move us.

But here’s the thing, a push needs something to push against.  Simply put, without something in the way, a push can not be effective.   A push needs resistance.  This resistance is typically some form of tension in ourselves that allows a push from the outside to be effective.  An effective push is one that moves us. It moves our mind.  It moves our body.

A push can be valuable and tell us a lot about ourselves.  If we “listen” carefully, a push can tell us where we are holding tension.  And this gives us an opportunity to release that tension.   Most of the time, that tension lives in our mind.   It can be a belief, a perception, a fear … it’s a thought or feeling that creates tension allowing a push to have impact and fulfill its purpose.

To illustrate this point, here is a video of a simple Aikido exercise.  Since it’s difficult to see the mind, we can use the body as an example.  Mind and body are connected.  The video demonstrates how tension in our body provides just the thing for a push to be effective.  We can be easily moved.

However, if we can identify the tension, remove it, the push has nothing to push against.   Like a lightening rod, we are “grounded” and allow the force to pass safely through us.

For those pushing against us, it’s a strange and very unsatisfying experience when there is nothing to push against.   Not surprisingly, they stop pushing.  

Would love to hear from you on how you manage life’s pushes.

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